Mother and Child trying to learn
Updated on 30.05.2024
My following article was originally published on November 26, 2020, and it is being reprinted today. I also feel that such articles should imbibe the feeling of maintaining the continued use of our Kashmiri language, which, unfortunately, is losing its spark, especially in the mega-cities within the Kashmiri community. Where our elderly people originally from Kashmir also have not maintained talking in their mother tongue, at least at home.
“Children Can’t Speak in Their Mother-Tongue at Home.”
Yesterday, while watching ‘Kaun Banega Crorepati’ on Sony-TV, one lady originally from Orissa who settled in Chhattisgarh, namely Ms. Anup Riya Das, won one crore as the prize money. She was immediately connected to her parents on the sets through video calling, and the scene was very emotional-when she conveyed to her mother and father about winning such prize money in her mother tongue, Oriya. The intensity of her and her parents’ emotional satisfaction was so intense and touching that I suddenly realized the true value and impact of one’s interaction in his mother tongue.
Undoubtedly, speaking our mother tongue helps us better comprehend and assimilate the culture of our ancestors. Language not only communicates facts, but also a way of life and thinking. It imparts knowledge of our cultural history in such a subdued way that most people are unaware of it. Of course, you should know your native language. There are some advantages. It gets you closer to your community when you go home. It gives you a sense of identity. It enables you to speak to your family members with a special affection when you are alone with them. When you are in a public place and you need to say something privately to a family member or a person who is close to you and from your community, and when others are within earshot, you will be better off if you can speak in your native tongue. Never mind if you can’t give grand speeches or lectures on technical matters in your native language. But they know enough to do basic communication. Mix words from major languages freely if you can’t do without them. It should not be an issue.
Of course, there’s nothing morally, socially, or legally wrong in not knowing your “mother tongue-also”.
Now if a question is asked, why should one who has been living because of circumstances or reasons beyond his control away from his native land not know his mother tongue? Of course, to be honest, it isn’t a stigma anymore—not being able to speak your family’s original language—not like it was 30 or 40 years ago in my younger days. It shouldn’t surprise anyone that you can’t speak your family’s original language. Therefore, in general, it is not a bad thing for you to not speak your native tongue. People might even say-while one’s roots and ancestry are interesting to know about, they are not essential, in the sense that they are neither necessary for survival or success nor would they make you a better person. But that is the people’s general view-as the saying goes, “Different folks, different strokes.”
Sometimes, because of circumstances, one is deprived of the opportunity to know or learn one’s native language. What if you were born outside of your hometown and were never exposed to the native language of your parents? Nowadays, parents too might have separate native languages, and they probably communicate in English or Hindi. Depending upon the place where they are settled And if you are settled outside the country away from your parents, you can be excused for knowing neither, if instead you give importance to learning the language spoken in the country or region you live in. That language gives you a wider reach than knowing your native language. But the question here is whether you need to be deeply connected with your roots or not. In case you need to remain connected, you also need to try learning your mother tongue because that is the reflection of your basic “cultural heritage” being strongly pursued.
Here, children who have been born and brought up outside the native land would surely say, “We have neither seen Kashmir nor adopted the Kashmiri language.” “We can understand the Kashmiri language but cannot speak it, mainly because our parents talk in Kashmiri between themselves.” Here, the parents can induce the feeling of becoming a proud Kashmiri Pandit in their children and make them learn Kashmiri by creating a special affinity for the language in their minds. It is not at all bad. Some people place great value in knowing their roots because they feel it is an integral part of their identity as people. I think, however, that more than your roots, your values, your views, and your beliefs, your actions define who you are.
There are very heartbreaking figures coming after the exile of almost three decades. In the past 12 years of exile outside our homes in Kashmir valley, the use of Kashmiri as the spoken medium has fallen to a shocking 32 percent among children and grandchildren of the Pandit community, according to a figure evaluation in the year 2002-03. Since the figures for the most recent evaluation have not yet been compiled, this must have dropped even further after 2003. If you take the case of grandchildren born after migration to Jammu and other places, hardly a few can speak the Kashmiri language, most of them in Kashmiri Pandit migrant camps. Another extremely unsettling finding is that Generation X will no longer be conversing in the mother tongue within the next six to seven years due to the language’s rapid decline in use, which is happening at a rate of 5% per year.
I have not touched on another very important factor: inter-caste marriages happening amongst our children, which in a way is also accounting for the further dilution of our Kashmiri culture and the use of our mother tongue.
When I took my case to be analyzed, I realized my children can understand the Kashmiri language very well, but they cannot speak it fluently. The reason, as discussed above, is that they were brought up in Delhi and their whole life has been so far spent outside their native land. They have not been brought up in the so-called Kashmiri atmosphere, where people would talk in Kashmiri and even follow their important festivities in their typical Kashmiri styles. Naturally, they are not to be blamed. Yes, we as parents need to inculcate in them the feeling of being a proud Kashmiri and make them realize the importance and strength of maintaining the cultural heritage of our ‘Kashmiriyat’.
Despite having been raised apart from my motherland since I left Kashmir in 1967, I feel myself incredibly fortunate for having acquired my mother tongue properly. Thanks to my elders who maintained that Kashmiri atmosphere strongly within our home in conversation and also in following our Kashmiri rituals, etc.
But that’s just me. Now for me, it would be a challenge to what extent I and my wife- who too is a strong Kashmiri- are successful in inculcating the strong value system and above all fluency in speaking our Kashmiri language within at least our family members at home.
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